Omg... after expressing my concern over the lack of due care being applied to the rules by our gracious referee. Rauru may have heard this...I was greeted with a succession of expletive laden grunts by 2 players. To which I said, to my incompetent opposite labouring under the illusion he was a strikers arsehole, the following (key dialogue)
"You cannot be serious, the Arggie was out of line, he left the field of play, the free kick gets taken and he waltzes back on like he's the shizzle. Its offside and unsporting behaviour. You're a grown man right, you ought to know the rules, we don't make this shit up for kicks and giggles."
He says and feel free to insert insulting expletives "no it isn't (whine) no it f...ing isn't. if you know so much (f...star) why don't you f...off and ref." "I have refereed, I know the rules and unlike you I can comprehend them coppertop (been watching reruns of Robot with the 2 year old).
Go on f...off or I'll knock your block off."
"WTF! Boom, you got me all scared. You going to be the big bad guy now f...knuckle. because that really hurts."
"I'll f...ing smash you s...head."
"The only thing you've f...ed up is your f...ing personality."
Queue smiles and a last "f...off" before Rauru saunters over to say "Calm down Calm diwn."
2 minutes later its a pat on the shoulder and "sorry mate" and "no worries".
Now, I get Pony but sly old paddy pulls out more dodgy cheating moves... Gus misses a sitter from 7 yards...Aaron ruthlrssly and shamelessly trys to main the opposition vertically challenged from behind after he passed him the ball... and 4 players get skinned by the midget and he scores...Chris comes down with kit but doesn't get dress...to name afew incidents. I gotta get to the pub
Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you the finest match report ever written!!
If it makes you feel any better Tim, Panda was officially Pony for skinning two players then tripping over himself in the box and handballing it, but since he's not official the honor is yours. I wanted to give it to Lloyd for failing to get off his duck when he kicked it straight at the keeper (he fought you off to get it too) but he was at the pub to deflect the attention away. Let that be a lesson to you all...
Tim - apart from that, that dialogue is some of the finest material to ever appear on the blog. The Marist guy should relax though, as that's just the way you also talk to your team mates!
12.28.7 DELIBERATELY LEAVES THE FIELD OF PLAY WITHOUT PERMISSIONPlayers who leave the field without the referee’s permission most often do so for unsporting reasons – for example, to create an unfair offside situation (see Advice 11.10). They may also leave the field to indicate dissent or to “manage” the referee’s next decision.If a player does leave the field for some other reason without the referee’s permission to do so, and this results in gaining a tactical advantage for his or her team, the player has committed misconduct and must be cautioned and shown the yellow card.
So Rauru ought to have given a yellow out, Marist need to get a few brain cells active...Heehaw, yippee-kai-ya and I'm still a pink ass pony...but at least I'm right (though considering the Paddy/Aaron option of a swift kicking offf the ball as its the Stallions way of resolution)
Sorry Paddy, I thought you did a swan dive in the box without Rauru whistling in a penalty, my bad. Et al, any further thoughts plonk them down and I'll see about a fuller match report shortly.
You tell that effing Marist knob jockey, Tim. He was totally in the wrong, by law, and worse: unsportsmanlike behaviour! I mean, really? You handled it well Tim,suggesting he was having a 2 year old tantrum.
As for that ref! Bloody hell, better take a trip to specsavers, or is there an unexplained deposit at Banc de Ruatoria?
Is this what he saw? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ICPyr0q0doY
Nah, the guy didn't leave the field of play. He was standing on the goal-line (behind Dan) but was still in the field of play. It's a stupid place to stand in all fairness cause he's gonna be involved in the play if the ball comes near him. It was possibly unsportsman like but that's debatable. By the by, there were 4 other Marist players that were offside from that free kick as they all went early but since Dan took it easy enough and they didn't interfere in the play there was no need to blow for a free kick. It's alright boys, I was all over it!
As for the penalty, I just don't like Gus. And Paddy, #youreacunt
Stallion was Tom for his allround play - 2 assists and a goal (no moments this game). MVPs were Tangihaere, Tom and ???. Lloyd, Paul or Aaron, can you remember?
"All over it." like a Mayor on crack more like. You see 5 players offside from the kick, surroundinding Dan in the penalty box and no whistle, not even a "Play on" call. Still thats a huge vote of confidence in Dan's hands. Sir Henry would have said something like this....
"He calls on intuition Never sees the ball That deaf dumb blind kid Sure plays a mean whistle"
This is a sensational read; Some awesome dialogue, The Who references, and what's more after several seasons where Paddy has been considered a fine upstanding citizen and father we're now being exposed game-by-game to his #NastySide.
I tried to make a good impression in my earlier years with the Stallions (notwithstanding a fight against the Raiders), but sadly am now reverting to type....
None of the players were involved in the play so there was no need for a whistle or a 'play on'. Had Dan fumbled into their path and they played at the ball, then yes there would have been a whistle. My understanding is that even if there is a touch from an opposition player they would be offside. Would need to look into how much of a touch is required before they are then onside. Will do some research and get back.
Offside offence A player in an offside position at the moment the ball is touched or played by a team-mate is only committing an offside offence if, in the opinion of the referee, he becomes actively involved in play by:
- Interfering with play Playing or touching the ball
- Interfering with an opponent Preventing the opponent from playing the ball by obstructing the player's sight or intentionally distracting the opponent
- Gaining an advantage by being in an offside position Playing the ball after the ball has rebounded off the goal, the goalkeeper, or any opponent.
Image 10, page 106 of this http://www.fifa.com/mm/document/affederation/federation/81/42/36/lawsofthegameen.pdf explains the situation from the weekend.
It could be argued that the player on the goalline was in an offside position and deliberately distracting the goalkeeper but my judgement was that he was just standing there. Yes it was to cause distraction but it's not like he was rubbing his nipples to get Dan excited.
Oi, no one asked for your thoughts on MVPS - it was decided in the pub, and is a privlige afforded to those who show up (as well as the old Pony awarding). not those who go missing after 'finding some food'with panda!
22 comments:
That awkward moment when Tim texts me pissed that he got pony #awkward #pleasedontyellatme #blamepanda
Definitely blame Panda - that guy has a grudge or something.
Omg... after expressing my concern over the lack of due care being applied to the rules by our gracious referee. Rauru may have heard this...I was greeted with a succession of expletive laden grunts by 2 players. To which I said, to my incompetent opposite labouring under the illusion he was a strikers arsehole, the following (key dialogue)
"You cannot be serious, the Arggie was out of line, he left the field of play, the free kick gets taken and he waltzes back on like he's the shizzle. Its offside and unsporting behaviour. You're a grown man right, you ought to know the rules, we don't make this shit up for kicks and giggles."
He says and feel free to insert insulting expletives "no it isn't (whine) no it f...ing isn't. if you know so much (f...star) why don't you f...off and ref."
"I have refereed, I know the rules and unlike you I can comprehend them coppertop (been watching reruns of Robot with the 2 year old).
Go on f...off or I'll knock your block off."
"WTF! Boom, you got me all scared. You going to be the big bad guy now f...knuckle. because that really hurts."
"I'll f...ing smash you s...head."
"The only thing you've f...ed up is your f...ing personality."
Queue smiles and a last "f...off" before Rauru saunters over to say "Calm down Calm diwn."
2 minutes later its a pat on the shoulder and "sorry mate" and "no worries".
Now, I get Pony but sly old paddy pulls out more dodgy cheating moves... Gus misses a sitter from 7 yards...Aaron ruthlrssly and shamelessly trys to main the opposition vertically challenged from behind after he passed him the ball... and 4 players get skinned by the midget and he scores...Chris comes down with kit but doesn't get dress...to name afew incidents. I gotta get to the pub
Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you the finest match report ever written!!
If it makes you feel any better Tim, Panda was officially Pony for skinning two players then tripping over himself in the box and handballing it, but since he's not official the honor is yours. I wanted to give it to Lloyd for failing to get off his duck when he kicked it straight at the keeper (he fought you off to get it too) but he was at the pub to deflect the attention away. Let that be a lesson to you all...
WTF? What cheating moves did I do?
Tim - apart from that, that dialogue is some of the finest material to ever appear on the blog. The Marist guy should relax though, as that's just the way you also talk to your team mates!
Blame me all you like Aaron you're still not gona score! #enjoyyoursourcreamandbeer
#vegansourcreamandbeer #hummusandbeer
#twitterisforcunts
12.28.7 DELIBERATELY LEAVES THE FIELD OF PLAY WITHOUT PERMISSIONPlayers who leave the field without the referee’s permission most often do so for unsporting reasons – for example, to create an unfair offside situation (see Advice 11.10). They may also leave the field to indicate dissent or to “manage” the referee’s next decision.If a player does leave the field for some other reason without the referee’s permission to do so, and this results in gaining a tactical advantage for his or her team, the player has committed misconduct and must be cautioned and shown the yellow card.
So Rauru ought to have given a yellow out, Marist need to get a few brain cells active...Heehaw, yippee-kai-ya and I'm still a pink ass pony...but at least I'm right (though considering the Paddy/Aaron option of a swift kicking offf the ball as its the Stallions way of resolution)
Sorry Paddy, I thought you did a swan dive in the box without Rauru whistling in a penalty, my bad.
Et al, any further thoughts plonk them down and I'll see about a fuller match report shortly.
Who was the Stallion and MVPs? I was there and I can't remember.
You tell that effing Marist knob jockey, Tim. He was totally in the wrong, by law, and worse: unsportsmanlike behaviour! I mean, really? You handled it well Tim,suggesting he was having a 2 year old tantrum.
As for that ref! Bloody hell, better take a trip to specsavers, or is there an unexplained deposit at Banc de Ruatoria?
Is this what he saw? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ICPyr0q0doY
We want RED. We want red!
Nah, the guy didn't leave the field of play. He was standing on the goal-line (behind Dan) but was still in the field of play. It's a stupid place to stand in all fairness cause he's gonna be involved in the play if the ball comes near him. It was possibly unsportsman like but that's debatable. By the by, there were 4 other Marist players that were offside from that free kick as they all went early but since Dan took it easy enough and they didn't interfere in the play there was no need to blow for a free kick. It's alright boys, I was all over it!
As for the penalty, I just don't like Gus. And Paddy, #youreacunt
Stallion was Tom for his allround play - 2 assists and a goal (no moments this game). MVPs were Tangihaere, Tom and ???. Lloyd, Paul or Aaron, can you remember?
MVPs: Tom (3), Tangihaere (2), Carrick (1).
"All over it." like a Mayor on crack more like. You see 5 players offside from the kick, surroundinding Dan in the penalty box and no whistle, not even a "Play on" call. Still thats a huge vote of confidence in Dan's hands. Sir Henry would have said something like this....
"He calls on intuition
Never sees the ball
That deaf dumb blind kid
Sure plays a mean whistle"
Enjoying the banter
This is a sensational read; Some awesome dialogue, The Who references, and what's more after several seasons where Paddy has been considered a fine upstanding citizen and father we're now being exposed game-by-game to his #NastySide.
I tried to make a good impression in my earlier years with the Stallions (notwithstanding a fight against the Raiders), but sadly am now reverting to type....
None of the players were involved in the play so there was no need for a whistle or a 'play on'. Had Dan fumbled into their path and they played at the ball, then yes there would have been a whistle. My understanding is that even if there is a touch from an opposition player they would be offside. Would need to look into how much of a touch is required before they are then onside. Will do some research and get back.
Offside offence
A player in an offside position at the moment the ball is touched or played by a team-mate is only committing an offside offence if, in the opinion of the referee, he becomes actively involved in play by:
- Interfering with play
Playing or touching the ball
- Interfering with an opponent
Preventing the opponent from playing the ball by obstructing the player's sight or intentionally distracting the opponent
- Gaining an advantage by being in an offside position
Playing the ball after the ball has rebounded off the goal, the goalkeeper, or any opponent.
Image 10, page 106 of this http://www.fifa.com/mm/document/affederation/federation/81/42/36/lawsofthegameen.pdf explains the situation from the weekend.
It could be argued that the player on the goalline was in an offside position and deliberately distracting the goalkeeper but my judgement was that he was just standing there. Yes it was to cause distraction but it's not like he was rubbing his nipples to get Dan excited.
He was standing behind the goal line, in the goal, then when the ball was kicked rejoined the field of play. Unsportsmanlike behaviour.
3- Tom
2- Tangihaere
1- Heath
Oi, no one asked for your thoughts on MVPS - it was decided in the pub, and is a privlige afforded to those who show up (as well as the old Pony awarding). not those who go missing after 'finding some food'with panda!
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