The Pony post from our beloved Heath
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My debut pony arrived in the first game of the year last season. As least this year I made it to the second week.
This week's game was located in the legal-high capital of NZ - Naenae. Playing conditions were marvellous apart from foot-long grass which made passing a challenge. The opposition looked young and fast but thankfully the dirty-old-men insults were just an Eastbourne tactic. Or perhaps it was the fact that Paddy, Lloyd, Carrick and Tim were missing. That’s almost 160 years of experience missing. Geezus.
We started well, making the most of a low key warm-up to blitz the first 10 minutes. Some great play around the sides resulted in an extremely agile run down the left wing from Bakie. With no room to work with, he crossed the ball into the path of a retreating defender who, unable to clear the ball from the goalmouth, could only watch as Rauru completed the follow up. 1-0.
It didn’t take long for Naenae to respond. A powerful warning shot from 30 yards was followed by a thunderbolt from the same distance. The ball clipped the underside of the cross bar and Paul stood no chance. Lesson learned - perhaps we'll start defending from further out.
Naenae then went 2-1 up after breaking through the middle. Tangihaere decided he'd already saved enough goal chances and called on Paul to front up. Unfortuantely Paul was still 30m from the ball and was powerless to a lobbed shot. Lesson learned - we need more goals.
Tragedy then struck as Bakkie went down with an over-laden little toe. With only the bare 11, all eyes truned to Gus on the sideline, still in his no.1s after a big Friday night. Despite strict instructions from his missus not to take the field, Gus pulled on his boots and strutted out. I assumed Gus couldn't bear to watch his fellow Stallions battle away with 10 men. He later confessed that a vacant striking slot was too mouth-watering to turn down.
Stallions went to the break knowing they would benefit from downhill conditions in the second half. The call was made for Route 1 football. Back to basics.
The second half started well. I managed to fashion a shot on goal and while there was acres of room to slot it inside the RH post, I smashed it straight at the keeper. Such poor direction caught the keeper by surprise and he could only parry it into the left hand corner. I apologised for such an awful shot. The keeper apologised to me for a poor save. It was a strange exchange.
We then went ahead. A lovely ball from [?] put Rauru through on goal and he cooly slotted his 2nd. 3-2 Stallions.
Naenae then pressed and when a stray cross flew towards our goal, I rose to help it on its way over Paul's outstretched arms and beneath the bar. Pony locked-in. First own goal in 30 years of football.
At 3-3, we pressed up-field to win numerous corners and free-kicks. Then, we only moments left, the ball emerged from the Naenae goalmouth. I nicked the ball from the path of an advancing Azza (who had a certain shot on goal - and even had his shirt half-off in anticipation of a goal celebration) and passed to Tom who chipped to the keeper. Most of the Stallions turned away to ready themselves for the restart only to find the keeper had somehow forgotten to catch the ball (perhaps with his mind on the next play). This description doesn't really do the whole incident justice but the result was everyone feeling slightly embarrassed and the Stallions winning 4-3.
Great games from everyone around the park. Particularly a great debut from Tharron in the middle, Tangihaere at the back and Glen filling in on the right.
Close pony-worthy moments 1. Glen for admitting he went for a 15km run before the game. 2. Gus for his yellow card dissent (geez, if you're going to get one, make it worse than that).
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For those of you that missed it, Heath's OG looked a little like #8 in this. The fight that happened afterwards is also reminiscient of Aaron and Heath's fight which should really claim the assist for Tom's goal, rather than Heath's pass. #3 is kinda similar to Heath's goal as well:
To be fair to Heath, he could have almost claimed Stallion as well with his goal which is pretty similar to a lot of these goals, in particular the one at 5:40.
Should also be pointed out that Paul went from zero to hero. Nice work Paul! A big save at a big time of the game.
6 comments:
Outstanding match report!
Glen - re your mention in the pony section - I've been fined heavily for similar indiscretions in the past - count yourself lucky
That is one great match report Heath, and great additions Rauru, but I've just remembered one thing that has been forgotten from this game and the pony discussion - Rauru, want to talk us through that terrible dive in the box?
Has Rauru been watching Suarez just a little too closely this season has he ;-)
You could smell the arrogance Corey - Pedro should have sent him off. And he was offside for like half of the game. I mean, its not like Pedro tells Rauru how to play his football, so he should not tell Pedro how to ref right?
Good to hear from you Corey, hope all is good. Missing the Stallions?
Other game highlight - finding a sheep's(?) jaw bone and teeth on the edge of the box. Was it a warning from Naenae? Either way, their dead sheep were scarier than their strikers. And quicker.
Haha, I was wondering where the chat went around that! To be fair, I never dive. I was waiting for the contact and it came so should have been a pen (unless he got any ball which I'm not sure). But I appreciate that it probably didn't look the best!
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