Nuff said
In all fairness this report should be written by a certain Mr Pringle but since we don't let ring-ins write match reports, I'll do the honors after a couple of bad misses against Marist.
Not too much to say other than Smashed 'em Bro. The final score line was probably flattering on Petone as we could have been 5-1 up easily at half time, and at least 10-1 up at full time. There were honestly that many chances that went begging.
After a week and a half my memory is hazy on the goals and assists and the order they came in but this is how I remember it.
1-0 - It started well with Carrick getting on the end of a through ball before getting brought down in the box, with the ref having no problem in awarding our first penalty in over a year. I stepped up and put it away.
2-0 - A short corner from Paddy to Carrick, the defence backed off so Carrick decided to smash it straight at the head of the guy standing on the near post who happily ducked out of the way.
Lots of misses. I missed one when a cross got whipped in from the right. Came to my left on which I hit first time from 8 yards but pushed it wide. Anything on target would have been a goal. Lloyd was also denied once (twice?) as his shot from inside the box was just deflected wide. Another year of goalless frustration from Lloyd?
3-0 - Carrick with another one but can't really remember how it happened. Came down the right hand side this time I think.
3-1 - Dan does his best Stevie G impersonation. No, not the blazing long ball to the full backs who are rushing forward on the overlap, the other Stevie G impersonation. The one that no Liverpool fan will ever talk about but will also never forget. With our defenders trying to play total football this sort of thing is gonna happen from time to time I guess and it happened again here. The D was trying to switch the play, ball gets passed to Dan, he takes a touch and lets it roll past him and an attacker nips it and beats Paul with the 1-1.
Half time oranges. Paul comes off saying he's feeling sick. I'd feel sick after giving up a clean sheet like that too ;). Graham into goal.
4-1 - A 'lost cause' is fought hard from Gus who with the ball looking like it's going out for a goal kick manages to put in an up-and-under. Keeper and someone challenge for the ball, keeper spills, defender mis-hits a clearance which floats to the edge of the 18 yard where Bakkie comes flying in a strikes it on the (half?) volley into the back of the net. Great strike and contender for goal of the season (even if the net was completely empty)
5-1 - Through ball put in, I get on the end of it, have a shot blocked by the keeper near the middle of the goal, ball rolls out to the corner of the 18 yard, I turn and put in a pi$$ weak shot that dribbles towards the goal, which the retreating keeper goes to collect and somehow manages to walk over the top of it. Contender for worst goal of the season.
6-1 - Throw from near half way, their defender doesn't clear, I pick it up and take off. From somewhere I hear Paddy yell "LLOYD!!" and look up to see Lloyd to my left steaming down the middle of the park like he had been all day. Keeper comes out, I tap in into the path of Lloyd who can't do anything other than put in into the empty net. Duck is broken (actually, I think he got one in the first week so ignore all my "Lloyd can't score" jibes. No doubt Lloyd recounts the stories of his goals to his daughters every night before they go to bed to remind them who the goal scorer of the house it).
7-1 - Dying stages of the game, ball is cleared to me around half way, I turn and chip it over their CB, Carrick runs on to it and makes no mistake. Game, set, match.
In amongst all this there's lots of moaning going on from Petone who aren't happy there are rolling subs, even though ref said to us at beginning of the game there was. Didn't exactly make a difference as we spanked them. Great start to the season. Lots of goals at both ends which makes us more and more like Liverpool by the day.
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