End of Season review - 2013

Very late, but needs to be done for record keeping. None of the award recipients were there so a second nomination was given to people who were.

Stallion: Paddy. Scored or assisted in every game he played (I think) except one which was a game vs Olympic at Wakefield when gale force winds meant he couldn't get it into the penalty box from his wing. Graham collected it on the night for only conceding 1 goal, from a penalty, in 3021 minutes of football. Amazing stuff.

Colt: Tom. But on a solid first season with an exceptional second season, full of goals and assists. Can't remember who got it on the night.

 Pony: Our favourite award which had the honor of going to Dan. The leakiest keeper this side of the Rimutaka Gorge. Conceded 11x the number of goals as Graham, and didn't get his name on the score sheet either. Thank goodnees that guy isn't playing for us anymore ;). Chris got it on the night as the only person there that didn't get on the score sheet.

We were also awarded club 'Team of the Year' for being the only team in the club to win a grade, and our 12 goals conceded (*cough* 11 by Dan *cough*) was the least number of goals by any team in any grade in Capital Football. What a team, what a year!

 

 

Downing his Sour Cream & Beer "I didn't get on the score-sheet" drink.

End of season Fantasy points: The Top Scorers

Paddy
Place: 1
Goals: 1
Assists: 11
Bonus Points: 16
Total Points: 82
Points per game: 6.8
EPL Fantasy alike: Damn shame that I can't think of a fantasy alike for the star player. Instantly you think of the playmakers - like Fabregas, Arteta, Milner etc Paddy has hogged the set pieces all season, hit an amazing number of assists and picked up twice as many bonus points as any other player. Unlike those EPL playmakers, however, Paddy has continued a remarkable inability to score any goals - and that would be the worst assist to goal record in the world. So thinking more laterally, we might have to go beyond the epl, to everyone's 2nd best, broken down, way too old playmaker - Simon Elliott.

Rauru
Place:2
Goals:7 (yes, I know - 'But I scored 2 goals in the games before we started this fantasy crap')
Assists: 1
Bonus Points: 3
Total Points: 62
Points per game: 4.42
EPL fantasy alike: Bobby Zamora: 'When you're sat in row Z, and the ball hits your head, that's Zamora.' Big strikers, big reputations, and both rock the white long sleeved undershirt. Both play damn well, but never quite the amount of goals the fans are hoping for. Zamora once scored 5 goals in a match for West Ham I think, and little else that season. Sound familiar? Rauru scored the biggest single haul for the Stallions with 21 points vs Lower Hutt (more than some of the defence got all season), remove that from the tally and what happens? Good season though, golden boot (though being the player he is, Rauru may be a little embarrassed at winning this with a grand total of 9 goals). Its a shame that just one more would have made double figures, and there was one moment this season I think when the ball was so close to going over the line (ha ha!).
Quote of the season: On being accused of leaving muddy Nairnville suspiciously clean - 'I can't help it if I have the balance of a gymnast (or was it ballerina?)

 Lloyd
Place:3
Goals:4 (1 other in fantasy 'preseason')
Assists:1 (now that can't be right)
Bonus Points: 9
Total Points: 57
Points per game: 4.38
EPL fantasy alike: Undoubtedly its Lloydy Lampard, similar number of points for the bosses of the central midfield. Suffered a little this season from Paddy's epic points haul, and like when Drogba goes to take pens and Lampard pushes him away, Lloyd must cast a dirty look at Paddy following the ref and preparing for freekicks in a footballing version of a hack lawyer chasing ambulances. For every show pony, there needs to be someone to do the graft right.
Moment of the season: the glorious chip over the keeper vs Elite, a thing of beauty - just a shame it hit the post.

Next: The (other) showponies

EXCLUSIVE - JADE EMBARRASSED, REMAINING STALLIONS REJOICE

And it all ended with a certain clappy captain politely being escorted out of JJ's by a big bouncer. A good end of season, especially good to have Nick there.

For those not there, Corey deservedly took out Stallion of the season, the Butch took home the carrot for colt, and gold ole Ben H pony of the year.

Shock news came in the form of Stallions/pony stalwart Ben H calling an end to his lengthy tenure in the team. Ben, you take a lot of grief, but you will be missed big time. We all expect a final blog entry/memoir of your time in the team.

With the cricketers inability to string more than a sentence and a win together last season, that will be about it on the blog front for a while, that is unless GUnit comes up with a plan.

Prize Giving TOMORROW

Just a casual reminder about prize giving tomorrow night. Kicks off from 6pm and best to get there early to make sure we get a good spot.

As mentioned there will be free food and bar tabs as well as an entertaining speech from yours truly and actual prizes for Stallion of the Year, Player of the Year and Pony of the Year. Make sure you're there or else no prize for you.

You don't have to be out for a big one. I'll probably be there till 9 then I've got to head off so it's only 3 hours of your time and let's be honest, all you'll be doing is watching the rugby in that time anyway - Yes I know that's a separate issue for those wanting to watch the Shield Challenge, but I'm sure the club is aware of that and the speeches should be over by 8 when I'm sure they'll put the rugby on.

Can everyone please reply to let me know their availability, whether you're coming or not.

And most importantly - who has got the Stallion and Pony?

Stats

For those people wondering how many games they did in fact play, here are the facts.

So amazingly I was the only one to play every match. Aaron and Ben were away for one and Jason kindly sat out once for the team.

Pretty good commitment all round really. Special mention goes to Nick W who payed full subs for only 7.5 games (More than you thought aye?). And Jamie, who I did refund some money, but he only played 4 bit part games. What a horror season for you mate.

Graham also was fairly low in the games played stakes, racking up only 9 appearances and on closer inspection he only once played 3 in a row. I'm not picking on you G, just pointing out the facts.

Late recruits Panda and Mike got alright value with 7 and 8 games respectively. Again, more than you thought aye Panda?

And our resident walking injury Corey actually managed 10 appearances, although how long those appearances were is another question.

On the goals side of things, Tristin finishes with an impressive one goal per game strike rate, while Gus finished with a respectable goal every 1.375 matches.

Last years golden boot Ben H, finished with only the 3 goals, but I'm sure he'll tell you he made up for it in assists.

Speaking of assists, I have a very unofficial incomplete tally (mostly only recorded what I could remember - so often just my own;)), but in case you were wondering this is how I have it:
Me 4,
Tristin, Rob, Gus 2
Hodges, Corey, Paddy 1

Now there's something to get you all fired up...

Outdoor Bowls End of Season

I have been holding off sending this email, hoping that we had another game this week. But I've been frequently checking the Cap Football site and it still has the old draw up. So we'll just have to be satisfied with an ultra competitive game of Outdoor bowls to satisfy our frustrations from what was an absolutely woeful performance on Saturday. Gus stretches out, while Aaron polishes his bowls

So it's all on this weekend, unfortunately a few of the boys can't make it, but as I said we were never going to get a weekend where everyone was available so I figured the earlier the better. Thanks Corey, Nick W, and Graham for being good cnuts and understanding. We'll be sure to drink your share of alcohol.

If anyone else suddenly can't come let me know as soon as possible so I can make a decision whether to postpone. Late withdrawels will not be tollerated, with punishment most likely being a visit to your house once bowls is finished.

The Mt Vic Bowling Club's green is unfortunately not ready so I have booked us in at The Park Bowling Club in Kilbirnie as they have an artificial surface. The only thing you need is flat soled shoes and your fine money. It costs $10 a head and they provide the bowls but that'll be covered by the fine money. 2pm bowl off.

Once we are finished drinking the cheap piss at the bowls club we will get a couple of taxi vans into town to repay the Bull and Bear's generosity. Anyone needing to get back to the Whanau can do so at this point.

Here is a map of where the bowls club is but it shouldn't be too hard to find, opposite the big Kilbirnie Park, I think it's close to the aquatic centre.
http://www.finda.co.nz/business/listing/1k3b/the-park-bowling-club-kilbirnie-inc/

I'm not sure what the weather is supposed to do but hopefully it holds out. Otherwise we will still go ahead and it might just be indoor bowls, darts, and pool (surely they'll have all that) plus drinking cheap piss as we would anyway.

I am happy to offer a ride from town for anyone that was planing on it being at Mt Vic and are unsure how they're going to get to Kilbirnie. Let me know and we'll figure out a meeting place.

See you on Saturday.

Cancelled again

Cancelled are Capital 5, 7, 8, 10, 14 and all MastersGrades that are cancelled will be given priority for the 23rd August
Sorry lads, we're off again. Sounds promising to get a game in next week. Free yourself up for the fine session too, it'll probably be our last one and we need to organise the end of season piss up. (WHICH MEANS BRING YOUR FUCKEN MONEY!)

End of Season '07

Just found the results of last years end of season celebration - framed on my wall! Nah, not really, but courtesy of the Lanes here's how the bowling ended up:

143 - Aaron
134 - Spencer
132 - Jules
128 - Nick G
124 - Robin
107 - Nick W
103 - Jason
100 - Gman (I've got a big bowl and I'm not afraid to use it')
99 - Ben H
93 - Ben B
91 - Patrick
81 - Lloyd
80 - Joe (headband for the rest of the night - nice).

A close correlation to goals scored I notice ...

Now I missed the go karting, but I hear Ben H came last by a long, long way - and was even beaten by 2 Stallions without a license and who have never driven. 'Ohhh Dad!".

So some thoughts to this year's end of season - hopefully we get at least 1 more game in - got to make a race out of the golden boot for a start!

Some suggestions have included: paintball, Phoneix game, laser strike, more bowling and go karting, mass hysteria, bbq, stallion tattoos, pimping Ben's ride etc etc. Throw suggestions this way. I kinda like the idea someone suggested of hiring out an indoor court for a couple of hours and releasing some football skills and high elbows on each other before going drinking. Obviously all events come with plenty of drinking. We got to celebrate a good season.

One other byproduct of the rain is that our fines have halted, so we don't have as much cash as we anticipated. And so few of you f**kers have paid up - so we need a decent collect.

Give it some thought ...