EPL picks

Here's what I reckon.  Post your picks in the comments and we'll see who's closest come end of the season.

I reckon this is going to be a bloody interesting season.  So many teams there or thereabouts and with so many changes to managers and squads it'll even things up a bit.  Here's my breakdown of it all and predictions for the season. 1st - Chelsea.  Will be boring to watch a lot of the time (see ManU for example) but should be efficient.  2nd - City.  Some potential big transfers so it depends how they settle.  Loss to Cardiff shows they are vulnerable.  From here you could throw a blanket over the others but I'm gonna stick my neck out and say... 3rd - Arsenal.  Assuming their DM, D and GK can hold somewhat strong, their attackers are potentially the best in the league.  Walcott, Ozil, Carzola, Wilshere & Podolski are class, and if Giroud can bag just a few of the opportunities they provide they should do well.  Lack a physical presence though?  4th - Man U.  I actually want to say 5th but surely that won't happen.  I'm not just being a Liverpool hater here either.  They squad just seems to lack a threat other than RvP but Liverpool showed how to keep him quiet.  They could finish anywhere from 1st-6th in my opinion, but I just find it too hard to believe they will finish outside the top 4.  January window very important I reckon.  5th - Liverpool.  Things very positive at the moment but you can't help but feel they lack enough quality to get them through a full season.  Could possibly make top 4 but could just as easily finish 7th.  6th - Spurs.  Controversial with all the potentially good signings they have made, but Bale carried them so much last year and I reckon it'll take a while for the newbies to settle.  If they keep this team together and add a few more they could be challengers in a few years.  7th - Everton.  Big signings on deadline day.  I'd take Lukaku over Torres or Ba any day so they've done well there.  Barry and McCarthy solid as well.  So that's my wrap.  I'd back myself to call Chelsea and City as 1 and 2, but after that it's anyone's guess.  What ya reckon?  Place your picks and we'll see who's right at the end of the season.

And a little comment about Fantasy EPL.  Aaron, so long a champion of FPL, is coming last.  Yep, last.  Funny does not even begin to describe it.

Fantasy EPL - Do it

Go to http://fantasy.premierleague.com/ and set up a team.
Enter you team into a private league with the code 48809-14563

You've got 2 days!

An Open Letter From The Raiders Captain

hey Ra,

Saw that the Stallions won the league, congrats mate. So glad it was you blokes and not those BNU or Olympic fu**ers. We had some ding-dong matches against those boys this year, few fisticuffs here and there... We lost to Olympic both times but knocked over BNU 3-2 a few weeks back, our best win of the year.

You guys were a class above this year, deservedly hammered us both times. We've had an up and down year, few departures and couple of long-term injuries to key players, but we kept on fighting.

Good luck if you go up.

cheers

Kris


Thought that was a pretty classy touch from him. They did us a massive favour by beating Brooklyn a few weeks before we played them so we owe them a thanks. Crack up that they find Olympic as much a bunch of f**ckers as we do. The centre back from Brooklyn also said to me as we were shaking hands "Oh well, at least it won't be Olympic". Can't wait to start up our rivalry next year!

Awesome effort gents

Hope this works....

CHAMPIONS!!!

Assistism

 Some cool infographics on where most assists and goals come from on the field, check it:

http://blog.kickdex.com/post/56157934804/the-perfect-assist

Where assists come from

And the chart in the comments shows that in the EPL you need about 10 passes from inside the box to create 1 goal.  What would the stallions charts look like?

It's our Destiny

Tangihaere's uncle gives the Stallions a pre-match speech on Destiny

Lads, I'm not sure how you're all feeling, but I'm getting a bit nervous.  There's a lot of injuries in the team at the moment and I feel like we built ourselves up so much for last weeks game we almost forgot about this week.  We were talking about last week's game as if it were a final, which it felt like it was, but Lower Hutt is not a push over, trust me on this.  A couple of seasons ago (it was the last game of the season actually) we were up 3-0 at half time and cruising only to lose 4-3.  We write Lower Hutt off at our peril.  A draw isn't going to be enough for us.  Only a win will do.  We need to get up for this game - big time.  One last big push.  LET'S DO THIS!!!

EPIC: Stallies v BNU: 3 August

After much hype and a lot of email-traffic in the build up to what was one of the Stallion’s biggest games of an epic season, Kelburn Park turned it on with great weather and the biggest crowd of the season (well, a couple of partners, 5 or 6 kids, Nick G, and long-time Uni supporter Harriet). It was fitting that the Gossies played curtain raiser to the day’s big game; a winner-takes-all match, with the prestigious Capital 6 title on offer should the following weekend’s games go to form.

Brooklyn’s coach offered his refereeing services prior to kick-off, but after a pathetic performance in the first round, Rauru wised up to his tricks and told him to F*&K right off (Ed's note:  I don't think those were my exact words...). With Tim late as usual, it was a slightly rearranged starting line-up taking to the field, including second-string keeper Pringle who had finally managed a clean sheet the week before. Tangi was there too – the baby’s head hadn’t yet crowned so there was just enough time for another 85 minutes of football - he’d have a word in the ref’s ear to get the first half shortened (who would know).

So to the match, and it was crucial that the Stallions got ahead early, to take the game to Pilsner (aka the whinging Brooklyn Shandy drinkers). The Stallions started the game with panache, happy to have Lloydo back in midfield after he missed the first round loss at Happy Valley. Capital 6 would be won or lost in the middle of the park, and the boys were more than up for it. As it happened, there were half a dozen goal-scoring opportunities created down the flanks and through the middle in the first half. Unfortunately I missed the lot. The most memorable move was a fantastic square ball from Tom, into the path of Heath, who burst into the box before whipping the ball across the face of goal for a gilt-edged scoring opportunity. Unfortunately, I (Carrick) scuffed it into the air before attempting a hand-of-god move, bundling the ball into the back of the net (surely the ref would fall for that one).

Nonetheless, the Stallions kept pressing with more opportunities coming my way: a great cross from Paddy but a poor header, a ball through the middle and I shot just left of the upright; then I blazed over the top and into the hedge. Next time I’d aim for the keeper (fifth-time lucky as I told Gus at half time). Heath read my mind and cracked a shot from distance - the keeper parried, but alas, no one to follow up. The first half went pretty quickly – well, the first 40 minutes did at least – with the ref blowing up 5 minutes early to give the older Stallions players a breather. But Brooklyn was wise to that old trick and they let us have an extra five minutes to try and score (wtf?). To be fair, I don’t remember our defence or keeper being tested too much in the first half, as we dominated possession.

Half time and the Brooklyn coach again volunteered to ref. Can’t you take a hint - feck off! As we’re well aware, Cap 6 can be won or lost on refereeing decisions. After a gee-up at the half time break and some sage advice for the underperforming striker(s), the Stallies picked up where they left off. Tackles were flying in left, right and centre. There was fisticuffs; handbags (most involving Tim, Rauru and any number of the Brooklyn tw@ts). It was game on. Everyone put their bodies on the line. Lloyd also put his face in the way of an ambitious bicycle kick from Brooklyn’s striker (think Tim broke the same guy’s face in the first game). Off to the blood bin, a bit of whiskey and water, and Lloyd was good to go again (very Stallion-like). The deadlock was finally broken as Lloyd put a great ball over the top for me to chase – and for the first time all season I finally got hold of one and smashed it into the ol’ onion bag. In true Stallions-style, we kept pressing and could have scored another - Tom blazed wide with a header from another Paddy cross. Lloydo had a chance to hit an open goal from 35 yards but put it wide (did it even go out?). I headed into the goal from another Paddy cross although this one was ruled out for offside – which was probably fair given what was happening at the other end.

Brooklyn’s attack was starting to find holes in our defence as they pushed forward in a desperate bid to save their season (surely a young team of quality players wouldn’t be banished to playing Cap 6 for another season?). Joe got his chop on. Aaron (?) blocked a shot with his arm inside the box. And there were some worthy shouts for a BNU penalty when Tim keeled over in the box and possibly handled (Ed's note:  Tim seems to cop a lot of blame for this but it was that cankles brother of mine at fault). Could it be that luck would again turn against the Stallions? Luckily the Brooklyn coach wasn’t reffing. Impartial referee Nick White held his nerve and waved play on. The Stallions went into defensive mode, ensuring a tough final 15 minutes. Keeper Pringle tried to run it out on numerous occasions, still p!ssed that he wasn’t on the score sheet for 2013. But the Stallions withstood the pressure, taking the game by the tightest of margins, and putting themselves in a good position to win the league.

Everyone stepped up and played well – the entire squad. As with most of the season, the Stallions played the best football and deserved to win (in my unbiased opinion). Even though it was a big game, I think we stuck to the Stallions mantra of play hard, have fun, and take the piss when appropriate. If we’d taken the game too seriously, Rauru would have subbed me off at half time and I wouldn’t have scored that goal from 20, I mean 30 yards? (let’s just call it the half-way line). Good luck this weekend lads. Give it your all, but don’t forget to play it Stallions-style (free beer for the most nutmegs).

Thoughts

Winning and pressure does funny things. It can change you - for the better or the worse. And this weekend's game is about as much pressure as this team has ever felt. The reality is, if we win, we are one win away from taking out the league. It's a position I didn't think we'd find ourselves in after losing to Olympic, and it's a kinda odd feeling.

I was talking with Heath before the game last week and we were talking about how winning has it's down sides. It's great to win, and it's great to play well in doing so, but the pressure that it creates sometimes isn't a good thing.

The Stallions have never taken ourselves seriously. It's why we're called the Stallions. There was an Italian student that was in our team in the first year and we did it to take the piss. We've always taken the piss. In the early days (before kids and wives) there were fine sessions that would go on for literally hours. People would rack up $5-10 worth of fines a week for the stupid things they'd say (Hodges), do (Hodges) and any other things like bad throw-ins (Butch), turtles and twizzles (Jules), uniform fines (Rob) and the like. At the end of the year we'd have literally hundreds of dollars worth of fines which went towards a night on the booze (remember that night at Willie's flat on Bond St? Carnage), or in later years a dinner out.

As we've gotten older with more responsibilities after the game, the fine sessions dropped away, and perhaps with it our ability to laugh at ourselves. We've still managed to do it a bit with the pink headband but even that has gone walkabout this season! I think we've been pretty good this season being able to keep that sense of who we are with such a large number of new players. All the new boys that have come into the team have been up for a laugh and are happy to take the piss out of themselves which is what we want. Our team is essentially made up of people who enjoy getting out there for a run but can't be assed going to trainings. We play to win but we have to keep in mind that we play to have fun. I feel that the danger is that if we start to take ourselves too seriously then we start to lose that fun aspect.

Which brings me to this weeks game. I'm torn between doing what we've always done and asking who wants to start on the sideline and selecting the team based around that, or selecting what I think is the strongest line up. I had thought about saying that the key players should stay on the field for the whole game with everyone else rotating in and out but I'm not sure that that's in the spirit of the Stallions. One part of me obviously really wants to win, but another part of me says that it shouldn't be at the expense of what that Stallions are about.

I see my role in this team as more of an admin type role. I liaise with the club, I organise balls, gear, people and whatever, but as far as the coach/manager type stuff goes, it should be a team thing, especially when it comes to weekends like this one. So, I'm gonna leave it up to the team. Feel free to post your thoughts. I'd be interested to hear what you have to say, even if you say it anonymously. If you don't want to say anything then I'll take it that you'll be happy with whatever the team decides.

Sorry for the long email, we're just in uncharted territory here!

Pick the Pony

There are 5 past or present Pony's in this photo from 1972.  Name them and their position.  E.g. F3 -  Aaron = Aaron is in front row, #3 from left to right.  R6 - Jason = Jason is in the rear, #6.

If you're in the photo or have intimate knowledge of the photo (i.e. you've seen this before and know the people well) you can't comment.

One of them is bloody classic.  I'm still laughing my tits off.

I just added the label to this and I think I may have posted this photo a few years ago.  Worth a repost though as there's some new Stallions since I posted it last.

OLYMPIC DROP POINTS!!!

We needed Olympic to drop points in order for us to have a chance and they obliged, drawing 2-2 with NW Wolves!  Current table:

TABLE AFTER ROUND 18

TEAM                                 P   W   D   L   F   A   GD   PTS
Wellington Olympic                 17  12   3    2  69  23   46     39
Brooklyn United Pilsner             16  12   2    2  70  23   47     38
Victoria University Stallions       16  12   1    3  63  12   51     37

Hardest Stallion ever

I'm due to get a wisdom tooth extracted on Thursday. I suspect that means i'll be marginal for the weekend. Might depend on how difficult it is to get out. Better assume I'm not in.
...

Teeth are good.  I'll be there.

Match report vs Nth Wgtn Rebels

As news that the Stallions would be playing at Nairnville Park permeated across social media, 100s of Khandallans made their way to the ground expecting to watch some free-flowing-total-football. Kick off was delayed for 10 minutes, due to the large numbers still needing to enter the ground, and for nets to put up.


The first half was characterised by some great flowing attacking play from the Stallions, and dominance in the centre mid field and back line, which meant that most of the play centred around the Rebel’s penalty area. Great chances were fashioned for most of the attacking players, and ultimately missed; most pony-like was from me (Tom), when after Paddy decided he didn't want to miss a fourth chance, squared it across the 6 yard line, only for me to scoop it over. The 1000s of fans were cheering and whooping, I’m but not sure if they were watching the same game.


When the only goal came in the first half, from a great Gerald run and pull back for Tom to smack one just under the bar, the crowd was silent - maybe they were Rebels fans? The siege of the Rebel’s penalty area continued for the rest of the half, only abating when their quickie up front managed a run through but to no avail.


1 v 0 at halftime.


The first phase of the second half laid to rest any chances of Rebels getting out anything from the game - 3 goals (2 from Patrick, assisted by Rauru and 1 from Rauru himself, assist by Lloyd), killed off the game, and was what the 10000s of fans had paid their money to see.


A change in refs, led to a) the last goal, as Tom, back from reffing duty, prodded in from 6 yards after a deflected shot/cross, and then b) a very clear penalty being waved away by Lloyd, as Heath, running clean through, was scythed down by a Rebels defender, about 5 metres off the ball. Lloyd was unimpressed, and play continued.


5 v 0 at full time, and job done.


Unfortunately, the Brooklyn Northern couldn't beat Olympic (they drew 1 v 1), which means that Olympic now have to drop points at either Raiders or Wolves. Unlikely, but this season has thrown up a couple of strange-uns…

Heard on the Sidelines #3627 - #3629

This post is gonna be a "Guess who?" edition. Who said what? Post answers in the comments section (and for all you newbies, you don't need an account, anyone can reply)

#1 - "The racism that comes mainly from the sidelines is just terrible but FIFA and NZF are unwilling to do anything about it" 
A comment made to a Radio NZ reporter after the loss to Olympic. Ah, say what now!? 

#2 - "That's the first header I've scored since July 22nd 1997 in that game against United" 
Wow. Must have been a memorable header.

#3 - "Let's just put the last 5 minutes behind us and move on"
"Well if you'd #%@&*# listen to what I %^@#*@ said then #^%*(&# %*&^# %$(*^#^@ alright?!?!"
Nothing like a good bit of in-fighting.

#4 - "Gus, get back in the $^#*@^ goal"
To be fair this could have been anyone.

Match Report vs Raiders

** As I've left it a little late, some of the details are a very sketchy -
feel free to edit as you see fit.

A fine day beckoned for the second leg of the all important derby fixture
played on the hallowed turf of Kelburn Park. The pitch was a touch on the
bobbly side with some patches of bog here and there, but otherwise
conditions were perfect for our newly adopted free-flowing cavalier 'total
football' style. The Raiders have long exerted dominance over the Stallions
in these derby's, but that had changed in the first leg so there was an air
of expectation - the Raiders wanting to reassert their recent dominance with
a steely determination from the Stallions to keep the momentum going in our
favour.

The Stallions started confidently, moving the ball around freely and
asserting an early edge in midfield with Lloyd and Heath winning the 50/50's
- no mean feat considering the Raiders historically strong and physical.
Chances were plentiful and it wasn't long before Carrick found himself in
space at the front and duly put the Stallions up 1-0. Another goal followed
shortly with Rauru getting on the end of a cross from one of our wide
midfield players who were both having effective games down the flanks. The
Stallions had their tails up and were winning all the crucial ball both in
the air and on the ground.

A third goal came late in the half to comfortably extend our lead. The pony
moment arrived just before the break with yours truly in an uncharacteristic
tangle/chop with one of the Raiders strikers resulting in Corey giving a
justified penalty. Graham's clean sheet record was breached and the Raiders
had something to play for again. A new policy has been floated that whoever
gives a penalty away should don the gloves - seems fair to me... a few of us
might have to brush up on our glove-work.

The second half was all the Stallions with some truly stunning end to end
link up play resulting in chances and goals galore. Paddy, Lachlan, Lloyd
and Aaron (the latter two breaking out of character ducks) all got on the
score sheet. Many more could have been scored and rarely did the Raiders
trouble the Stallions back 4. The key was fluent movement, intelligent runs
and passes, and a steely determination to win the 50/50's which we did to
great effect.

The score ended 7-1 and was a further marker that we as a team laid down to
the competition that we are real contenders this year for top honours.
Stallion worthy moments were plentiful with storming games from all involved
- standouts would have to be Lloyd and Aaron for their goals and subsequent
celebrations.

A big thanks to Corey for reffing too - a testing game for a ref with plenty
of passion that he handled with aplomb.

A lil something something to warm you up for the big game

Guess who's back, back again...

 Despite a full compliment of players for Monday Night Football, we'll see the return of........??

 This video is all the more relevant with a photo that I'll post next week. You'll see why...

Sound Familiar?

A comment on Joey Barton's blog asking how good Neymar is. If you are interested blog here (http://www.joeybarton.com/neymar-what-i-really-think/).

Answer: He's not as good as Barton.

But the best part of the blog is definitely this comment after everybody has gone on about how great he is:

KTsa 5 pts

Personally i think he is pony

 

The Perfect Set of Results

Victoria University Stallions	3	FINAL	0	Miramar Rangers
Brooklyn Northern United Pilsner	2	FINAL	3	Victoria University Raiders
Marist Inter	5	FINAL	0	North Wellington Rebels
North Wellington Wolves	4	FINAL	1	Lower Hutt City Green Machine
Wainuiomata Undertakers	4	FINAL	3	Wellington Olympic

Nice win stallions - that scoreline suggests to me shit conditions but a solid effort, but an important 3 points considering that both Brooklyn & Olympic lost.

So does this make next Monday's game one of the most important we have played?

Game tomorrow transferred to Crawford Green (opp Scots Coll)

Heard on the sidelines #4183, #4184 & 4185

Raiders midfield as Tangihaere steps up to deliver a goal kick: 'step back, he' s got a big punt', 'Yeah, I know' - cue Tangihaere to totally scuff the kick and it skids along to their striker.

Logan, after arguing with Corey: 'My dad's a referee!'.

'F**king Retard' - Raider's skipper yells at the goalie after Rauru's open goal.

Goodall doing himself proud.....

So I received an email from a certain balding, ex-Stallion midfield "dynamo" now resident on the Kapiti Coast.  It went something like this....

"In other news Goodall was playing in the game next to my one against our first team…. He saw me warming up nearby our first team and he thought I was playing for them so yelled out “Jesus they’re scraping the bottom of the barrel aren’t they?”

At some point in that game he was sent off and they lost 4-3… from the resulting penalty perhaps. So …

In the clubrooms he asked me not to pass on the fact he’d been red carded to the stallions. Of course it was my duty to, but upon trying to discovered that I have been removed as an administrator on the unistallions blog …the final insult!"

Made my day!!!!

Return of the blog posts

Some will say Aaron is just reinstating this after finally getting on the score sheet (you hear that Panda - yeah screw you and your stupid little pointy goal celebration), and they would at least partially be correct - but the real truth is after 4 of us were sitting around bullshitting after a great victory it was decided we got to pick up our off field/virtual activity again. With no match reports there is less general taking the piss, without the mvp points there is less discussion about who deserves recognition, without awarding the pony there is no pink head band, without all of this the legacy of this team stops - its damn good to be able to look back and see that in this corresponding game in 2008 (!) we first spotted Logan playing for the Raiders, and he got chopped good. It was also Tristin's first game for the Stallions, a sweeper we heard. This is our history!

So Rauru and I are going to try to reconstruct the last 4 games or so we haven't taken any stats from. But lets start by getting this game correctly accounted for, and a match report from the pony - which just so happens to be JOE!!!! Not only did he concede the pen, but more importantly broke Graham's clean sheet record. Personally I was gunning for Tangihaere, but that's mainly because he yells at me.

Pony: Joe - chop chop on the match report Joe (like what I did there?)
Stallion: Did we decide on a Stallion moment? Nominations? I would go for Lloyd finally getting his goal, calmly finishing off a beautiful 1-2.

Goals (help/correct me here):
1. Carrick (Aaron)
2. Carrick (Aaron)
3. Rauru (their crap keeper - or 'the f**king retard' as their captain yelled at him.
4. Lachlan (assist?)
5. Gerald (assist?)
6. Lloyd (Carrick)
7. Aaron (their shit defender?)

MVPs: Partial recall on this: Carrick, Aaron, Lloyd?

Rauru, any news on the Raiders facebook page?

Some good heard on the sidelines to come ...

Why so sad?

I added some photos to Facebook the other day.  Note Facebook's suggested tag under the photo of my daughter.  Who are we to argue with Facebook?!  I've never really thought of Graham as a big sooky-baba but if Facebook says it it must be true!

Cancelled. I wonder why they did that?

View of Anderson Park.

Let's hope the weather improves for next weekend's derby v. the Raiders at KP @ 2:30pm.

Game cancelled tomorrow

Pony?

 From last weeks game - too late for a match report I guess, but we want someone wearing pink.

Didn't Krip show up at the wrong ground? BOOM!

MVPs etc get tricky on those week days, oh well fantasy gone to hell anyway - we are too successful to care really ...

Breaking into the big time...

CityGalleryWgtn ‏@CityGalleryWgtn38m

Curator Aaron Lister talking with Nightline. Tune in tonight to find out what he has to say about Gregory Crewdson pic.twitter.com/4PydoYZYIr

 View photo


Interview here.

Abusive Team Given the Boot!

Olympic in trouble

Stallions have a different approach - we sweet talk the ref.

Losing Sucks

 Lets make it the only one this season.

A good commiseration turn out at the pub. Decisions as follows:

Stallion: Tim - the headband has never been put to that use before.
Pony: Dan - 'Get that man out of the wall' ...

MVPS:
3 - Gerald
2 -Tangihaere
1 -  Dan

Damn, someone tell me if those mvps are wrong.

Stallions v Marist: the report (as correct as I can recall)

The track was sticky, rough but ready. Marist looked mean and well kitted out in matching gear. Their training drills and organisation was on display and they looked like a team and a half. Little did we know that that half was going to leave it’s mark later on. The weather had done it’s best to unravel our run but fortunately the elements had abated to give the pitch a few days to go from sodden to tacky. The sun made up for the chill in the air and uncharacteristically the wind was down to a mild swirl.

The tone of the match was set when Marist placed 10 men behind the ball and our defence got to pick their noses while the midfield and forwards played in the muck. From the sideline, we could see how effective Heath and Lloyd were in the middle. The opposition spent much of the time without the pill and chasing their shadows. But for all the forays forward it took about15 minutes before Tom sashayed up the left flank and dropped in a sharp flat cross which was met by Carrick(?) who clipped the ball into the back of the net with ease.

Lloyd steamrolled through the centre of the pitch, all the way to the penalty area. It was a continuation of his strong performance and he faked a pass to me and knocked the ball in behind the last defender. The he muscled in behind, holding me off, to take the shot which was straight at the hapless keeper. It ricocheted off the keepers chest and just beyond the nearby Stallions. Lloyd’s play so far this year really deserves a goal and this was a guilt edged chance so expect him to be fired up again to get off his duck.

Panda made his 2013 appearance and didn’t disappoint. Several solid pieces of play and some tricky bits of skill to stupefy the Marist defence. One such move saw him glide past 2 defenders, left then right only to get his left/right brain muddled and he collapsed in a twisted heap on top of the ball. Still, with some fitness you could imagine yet another attacking option for the Stallions coming to the fore.

It was evident that there were a few too many flicks and hopeful touches rather than firm passes and a lot of possession was squandered, much to Marist’s relief. The consolation was that every time we turned the ball over it came straight back to us and when you have possession of nearly 70% you can afford to lose a bit of it. Gus and Carrick were gainfully employed getting a fair share of the ball but it was difficult to play in the mud and congestion and still be able test the keeper. That said, there was enough heat on the keeper to suggest doubts on his competence. Another run along the baseline from Tom and a cross struck hard into the danger zone resulted in an own goal to the Marist but you could tell Tom would be adding to his Fantasy points tally in this game.

Interestingly, you could count the fleeting attacks by Marist on one hand during the first half yet at least three of them resulted in shots of sorts. Wayward as the shooting was, it did offer a glimmer of potential for them but you couldn’t call it much more than a small sparkle. The best through ball they got was a possible back pass from Paul but ultimately they had little to offer once they hit the final third.  Dan had one high shot to deal with but it was a fairly simple half when all is said and done. It looked likely that the Defence and Midfield were likely to prosper from a clean sheet. Tangi was a colossus in the backline providing real backbone and distribution when the ball appeared in our half.

Though the opposition looked meek in all positions it was their centre midfield threesome that showed some ability. The Argentine looked sharp and skilful but beating our players in his defensive third was never really going to help them much. The two shorter chaps also had some promise but dropping a striker back to the midfield meant that even when they had short periods of possession there was no one to pass it on to as their wide halves disappeared into the ether. I’m sure that Joe and Paul felt lonely out wide with little to do but get cold and bored.

On the turn at halftime, the conversation was pretty positive with a hint of frustration at the scoreboard but it was hard to fault the general play in the slippery conditions. Certainly the endeavour was there and you can’t argue with the relative ease with which the goals came.

The second half saw more play down the right flank with Patrick, Krip and Carrick linking up on numerous occasions along with the odd massive punt from Dan with all moves creating real threats. Gus and Paddy linked up resulting in each of them scoring and assisting the other. Tom also managed to benefit from play on the other flank which saw him cap off another strong performance with yet another goal.

This half proved to be a little more free flowing with Marist making a little more endeavour but in the main, the more they extended forward the more pressure they faced when they lost the ball. We saw more entertaining linking play from the backline with Krip and Joe, Paul and Aaron moving the ball about, largely without fuss. One particular moment comes to mind when the ball was gracefully played about before Aaron tried to thread a pass though the midfield only to lay it onto one of the vertically challenged Marist players. Aaron to his credit saw fit to atone for the pass by attempting a tackle, only to be beaten yet he managed to turn, chase and hack the player down. A yellow card offence. The groans where audible from all quarters, yet asking the ref to send him off seemed most unlikely. The resulting free-kick has seen great interest on the Blog, both from the application of rules (or lack thereof) and the heated exchange that seems to have resulted in the allocation of Pony. I will let the relative inconsistencies of Pony allocation speak for themselves and would suggest that speaking one’s mind pales in comparison to common assault.

Gus made an inspiring move into the Marist goal-box only to be chopped down like an unwanted rats-tail yet the ref was looking elsewhere and the formality of a penalty was lost. The irony was as Gus lay on the ground, on top of the ball, he was called for deliberate handball. A yellow card offense. Gus also collected a beauty of a through ball from Carrick, delightfully played into space, but from 7 yards he blazed the ball past the far post (if only just).

Carrick was also the beneficiary of a lovely piece of play that involved 7 players, stretching the ball from the right side of the defense to the middle, back to the left defense, back across to the rightside. Then a huge cross field ball to Panda's shin back to Paddy (or Tom) who crossed the ball onto Carrick's forehead and it just whisked passed the far post. Simply entertaining classy footy.

By this time the opposition was feeling a bit bitter and vented at most opportunities, be it the ref, the nearest play or a loose leg. By rights they had little to complain about. Yes some of the calls could have gone their way but the result looks to have flattered them, the pitch reigned in the scoreline and the bit of magic by the half pint was perhaps the most gifted individual move in the match. This move saw the little fella collect the ball 10 metres out of the penalty area, jinking and skipping he managed to evade 4 would be defenders, making it to inside the penalty area before opening out and slotting the ball inside the far post. Admittedly the fear of cutting him down perhaps enabled him to get as far as he did but anyone pulling that off deserves some credit. The biggest surprise was that Aaron “the hatchet” was one of those 4 so perhaps 'the earlier injustice was served.

A tricky call as it was a good all round team performance but in the end MVPs do stand out: Tom (3) not for any particular moment more for yet another high performance game. He is often the crucial contributor in the attacking third.  Tangihaere (2) his pure muscle stunted any attack that came his way. It was just the sort of performance we will need this weekend. And Carrick (1) for tireless work up front and some silky passes which will get us goals as the season continues. Stallion: Tom. The Stallion moment was discussed in the pub and hasn't made it to the media as yet. Another contender would have to be Lloyd’s 2 forays from halfway for at least 30 metres, toying with the Marist players with ease. I thought this was pure magic for a midfielder. As for Pony, the selectors chose me, Tim. However hard done by, non attendance at the pub comes at a cost, it’s a lesson. Pony is firstly about fallibility and secondly about avoidance. If you fall into the first category, you need to have an avoidance strategy and that starts by getting your ass down to the pub. And as I get the last word as far as the match report goes I would suggest options Pony is amongst the following options:

1. Tim: for the heated debate over the rules of the game (see Blog)
2. Aaron: for the ferocious attack from behind on the smallest player on the pitch and at the second attempt.
3. Lloyd: choking from 6 yards after a sizzling run of 30 metres instead of passing to a free player or leaving it to a striker.
4. Gus: for choking from 7 yards after Carrick’s beautiful through ball
5. Rauru: for creative umpiring decisions.
6. Rauru: for dismissing the certain penalty when Gus was cut down in the opposition goal box.
7. Panda: as much said in the report above but as he’s not a regular and we need someone to wear the pinks best leave the attire to someone else.

Meanwhile, lets starting thinking about the battle ahead. Based on the games we've had these guys are easily our equals if not a little better on attack. They've leaked more on defense and struggled in a surprising match against Lower Hutt. They did demolish Olympic and Wainui and those results are telling in terms of capability. This is a season defining game. Win it and we have a cushion in case we have a hiccup. Draw it and we stay in the running. Lose and we need to rely on other teams to help us out which does us no favours. The game will be won by solid defense, possession and obviously by scoring. The latter is less important in that we have proven we can be patient and score. This will be a game where we work hard, support each other and we can get the rewards, but we will only achieve this as a focused unit.

So

Who is going to tell Tim he got the pony?

Stallions 2 - 0 Wainui

Wainui's goalkeeper

There's not much to be said that hasn't already been said.  Without Wainui's superhuman goalkeeper the score would have been a lot more.  6'4", agile as an agile thing and with pecks that make ladies blush, he puled off a number of saves that kept Wainui in the game a lot longer than they deserved to.  

0-0 going into half time, the Stallions had the better running of the whole half.  It felt like it was going to be a matter of time before we scored, but we needed some kryptonite.  As it turned out we didn't.  We just needed Tim.  As a corner from the left was swung in, Superman came for the ball but missed and Tim was on hand at the far post to nod in.

This was after Graham had pulled off a Superman save of his own at the other end to keep the game at 0-0 in one of Wainui's only shots on target of the game (he was to later repeat the feat with the score at 1-0.  I think he was only called on to make 3 saves which makes them all the better.  Hard to stay focused when nothing is coming your way).

As the clock wound down and I was getting anxious at the level of attacking football we were still trying to play (no running the clock down for Stallions 2013!) the game was secured with a swift counter attack that was finished with a cheeky chip (was that a shin to a bobbling ball?) over the onrushing keeper.

Odd that it was possibly our best game of the season yet our smallest winning margin.  Gotta love football.

As for why I'm writing this report?  I don't think there has been a faster Pony moment in Stallion history (actually yes there has, 10 points if anyone can remember what it was!).  We have the kick off, Gus rolls the ball forward to me, I slip, semi recover, stride forward, kick the ball, pull my hammy.  Game over.  All in 1.58sec.

If it wasn't for that then Paddy would have been a shoe-in.  A terrible dive in the box, a couple of misses and a woosy pants assist for the final goal when he could have scored himself because "I didn't want to anger the big man".  Quote unquote.

Stallion is Graham for a huge save at 0-0 which took his clean sheet minutes to over 300.  Should make team of the week.

Since I have the power of the match report, I also get power of the MVP points.  A lot of talk about it, and with everyone (except this writer) worthy of points it was a very hard decision.  But the points go to:

3 - Gerald.  His combination with Tom has been huge the last two weeks (and they've alternated between playing mid and D).  It's given width and a solid way to bring the ball out from the back.

2 - Heath - Owned the center of the park with Dan.  He gets the points rather than Dan because he actually passed the ball and we want to reward him with positive praise (not that Dan didn't, but as a teacher you reward children when you see positive behaviour that you want to continue to happen ;) )

1 - Tom.  See reasons for G.

Tim - You're on fantasy points.

Return of the Red

This colour card was pulled twice in our games last season - once for an attack on Gus (he got the Pony award for it as it was disgraceful) and once when Gus did the attacking (he got the Pony award for it as it was disgraceful).  Speaking of which, since I probably won't be playing on Saturday, looks like Gus will wear the headband.

He's back.

Raiders struggling

Raiders match report

Alright boys, let's put last night behind us and move on. As Grant pointed out, we were quite flat. Marist are a decent side but I think, overall, we're a better team than the performance (5-3 loss) suggested.

Too many passes not going to players and Joe left stranded more than once. Couple of cracking Marist goals though. I think individual errors were pretty costly... but that's football and we had plenty of bright moments - Mike, in particular, scored a beauty of a goal (great buildup involving Andy T and Jules) and he was like a man on a mission all night.

Grant would be filthy if I didn't mention his goal. I managed to get my head (more like my face) to head one down into the area from a corner and it bounced kindly for the big man, who absolutely buried it. Cue tearing back to halfway, arms aloft. Well-deserved.

Brains Trust

Fantasy EPL Results 2012-2013 Season - too easy.

	#	Team	Manager	GW	TOT
	1	005	Aaron L	51	2,151
	2	Poroufessor	Rauru Walker	56	1,970
	3	koomes	Daniel Wharakura	50	1,968
	4	Porirua City	Jason Aitofi	23	1,943
	5	South Coast Taniwha	Nick Goodall	43	1,772
	6	Miracle of Istanbul	Patrick Sawyer	56	1,765
	7	Portman Rd Plodders	Graham Mann	55	1,735
	8	LL	Lachlan Lepper	32	1,643
	9	Team Indifferent	Paul Kilford	19	1,449

Heard on the Sidelines - the injury edition

"I've got groin strain from last wkd and indoor, which hasn't settled down. I will still come down Saturday and play if really really need to, but otherwise will fill a spot on the subs bench." - Gerald via email. Yep, we really really need you G!


"Keen for a run? We've got 13 but a few carrying injuries so could use 1 more for cover" Rauru text to Gus. 'Cover' is code for '90 minutes'. Everyone knows that.

Khal Drogo finally defeated

Good win today against Wainui. Missing their talisman play-maker Bruno, the Undertakers roped in Khal Drogo to play in goal and f*ck was he good!

Nominations for Stallion / Pony? Hard to go past _that_ save from G-man, or pulling a hammy with literally the second kick of the game. Where was the pinkage this week - isn't that an automatic re-pony offense?

My nominations for MVP points (in no particular order) Tom, Carrick, Graham

Fantasy points vs North Wellington Wolves

I forgot to add this photo with my match report last week.  It summed up my day.  At the pub afterwards, having a beer and a wedge, and a big dollop of sour cream ends up in my drink.  The upside is that we've worked out the punishment if you don't score a goal this season - skull a beer with a BIG dollop of sour cream in it!

Graham - 60+, CS, 3 saves = 8

Tangihaere - 60+, Defensive Clean Sheet = 7
Paddy - 60+, DCS = 7

Tim - 60+, DCS = 7

Tom - 60+, DCS, D goal, 3bp = 17

Lachlan - 60+, DCS, D goal = 14

Chris - 60-, CS = 6

Gerald - 60+, Mid CS, assist = 7

Lloyd - 60+, MCS, 2bp = 7

Heath - 60+, MCS, M goal = 9

Carrick - 60+, MCS, M goal, assist, 1bp = 13

Bakky - 60+, assist = 5

Rauru - 60+ = 2 :(

Goals (assists) - Carrick (Bakky), Tom (Gerald), Lachlan (none given), Heath (Carrick)

Stallion - Tom for his cracking strike from 30 out.  

Other contenders include Lachlan for his goal from 30 out (up there with Tom's but it was a shit first touch that put him in position and he slipped as he kicked the ball) and Chris for taking down a man literally twice his size.  Getting called a 'maggot' was good entertainment value as well.

Pony - Bakky for his disgraceful bakky-healed attempt at scoring when he could have paid it on a plate for G (the fact that G would have blazed over anyway doesn't matter).  His attempt at saying there was a man in between them when the only thing between them was 3m of fresh air, and his 5-year-old-boy cry of "Mummy!  Why won't they pass it to me on the left!" tops it off.

Other votes went to Graham for charging out of goal only to clear the ball straight to their strikers, then walking back to the penalty spot to pick daises while the defenders threw themselves about trying to maintain the clean sheet, and Paddy for the ultimate in unStallion-like behaviour of kicking one of their players off the ball like a petulant child after a minor tussle.

Yeah, maybe I do need to work on my throws a bit..

Fantasy vs Rebels

As usual late and probably wrong.

Dan
Graham	60+, 1/2 D clean sheet, mf goal, 2bps	11
Tim
Tangihaere	60+, c/s	7
Paul	60+, c/s	7
Jason
Joe	60+, c/s	7
Chris
Paddy	60+, assist	5
Lloyd	60+, assist	5
Aaron	60+, c/s	7
Gerald	60+, goal, 1bp	7
Heath	60+, 2 goals	10
Tom
Bakkie	60+, 4 assists, 1 goal, 3bps	21
Rauru	60+, 2 goals	10
Carrick

Leaderboard:
Bakkie  56
Rauru  43
Tim  42

SAF - GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONE!!!!!

Jason's Facebook page was a hive of activity tonight with the announcement that Man U are going to suck next year.  Discussion turned to why Moyes and why he should or shouldn't be the manager.  I said that he doesn't have any qualifications in terms of dealing with egos which started off this little thread.  Gotta love Joe for sticking up for one of his own!  Love your work Joe!

And for the record, I hope that Moyes does get the job.  That'd make both Everton and Man U shitter which as a Liverpool fan is the best possible outcome!

Stallions 7 - 0 North Wellington Rebels

It’s not often that you sit down at the pub after a 7-0 win and the mood is somewhat low, but that seemed to be the case after the latest win.  There didn’t seem to be much intensity which is probably to be expected when you aren’t met with much intensity, but when you put 7 goals past an opponent and could easily have had at least 3 more, things must have been going well.

The Stallions defence was largely untroubled and worked the ball around the back with good movement.  Almost all the goals were scored with a number of passes strung together, and I can’t think of any that were scored from outside the box which shows that the tiki-taka style of football is paying dividends.

The Stallions were up 3-0 at halftime with goals to me, Heath and a debut goal for last weeks Pony, Gerald, with Bakky providing the assist for all three.

The first was a well worked move down the left with Bakky putting in a cross which I met with the head and glanced it past the keeper.  1-0.

That shortly became 2-0 when Bakky put in a neat little through ball to G who got there just before the on-rushing keeper and managed to bundle it over the line.

The third came after another ball was whipped in from the left (from a corner maybe?) which Bakky met with his head.  The keeper saved but only managed to parry right into the path of Heath who was following up well to prod it in. 

It should have so easily been 4 but it wasn’t which is why I’m writing this match report.  I think it was Bakky again that put in a neat little through ball which I ran on to.  The keeper came out but I got there first and tapped it past him to his left, leaving me about 18 yards out on the corner of the box.  With an open goal I hit it with my left and watched dismayed as I missed by a good meter or two leaving the crowd roaring with laughter.  Continue laughing fools, your team has conceded 300 goals already this season (or was that Panda and Paddy laughing on the sidelines?).

The second half was much the same.  Bakky prodded in a goal mouth scramble, he provided a tap in for me after jinking to the byline then cutting it back, Heath got on the end of a Paddy corner and nodded home and Graham scored a great goal after Lloyd evaded a few defenders and put in cross which Graham met with his left after running in from right midfield.  Bakky claims that it was 90% shin but I’m pretty sure he’s just jealous since despite being the top goal scorer, none of his goals even come close to being as classy as Graham’s ;).

 Again, amongst all this I earned another nomination for Pony.  Paul put in a defence splitting through ball from the back, I ran on to it, cut back on my left taking out the defender and most of the keeper, and then with my right managed to miss the goal left with about 80% of it being wide open.  However I was not alone in the nominations for Pony and on another day it could have easily been someone else writing this blog.

-          No one will forget Paul’s throw-in in the second half which went twice as high as it did long.  As ugly as it was it was probably a legit throw-in!

-          Joe put in a fantastic cross in the first half.  Unfortunately it was down our end and straight to one of their strikers who was sitting in the box.

-          Paddy’s disgraceful blatant attempt at getting more fantasy points by trying to curl in a corner with his right foot from the right hand corner.  He managed to hit the post but his blatant disregard and lack of respect for the opposition is matched only by Mario Balotelli’s back heal attempt at goal.  We actually gave him Pony for it at the pub but he cried and packed a sad so we felt sorry for him and I got it instead.

-          And had they scored from it, Aaron surely would have got a Pony for his MASSIVE air ball.  Attempting to clear the ball he took a huge swing at the ball and only managed to push it further towards our goal and one of their strikers.  It took a good save from Lachlan to keep the clean sheet.

So after all that, here’s how the breakdown goes:

Stallion – Graham for his great goal.

Pony – Rauru for a shocker of a miss (or two)

MVPs – 3-Bakky (goal and 4 assists), 2-Graham (clean sheet and good goal), 1-Gerald (goal and good work down the left)

Goals (assists) – Rauru (Bakky), Gerald (Bakky), Heath (Bakky), Bakkie (none credited), Rauru (Bakky), Heath (Paddy), Graham (Lloyd)

Raiders finally speak

Funny what winning does to a team.  Raiders had tons of match reports last year as they just missed out on relegation.  This year they have been non existent.  Sounds like a great win for them today.

Fantastic 4-3 win today after being down 3-1 with about 20 left. This is the Raiders I know and love - digging deep, never settling for a loss or draw, fighting to the death. Lower Hutt were a decent side but we wanted it much more. The win has put us 7th and we have the chance to keep moving up the table next week v the other Nth Wgtn side. Nairnville, 12.30 is the kickoff.

Our one will be up at some stage once Paddy the Pony stops sulking and writes it up for that disgraceful attempt at scoring direct from a corner.

Olympic Fantasy

A boring week fantasy wise!

Dan	60+, 3+ saves	3
Tim	60+, defender goal, 3bps	12
Paul	60+	2
Paddy	60+, assist	5
Lloyd	60+, 2bps	4
Aaron	60+	2
Gerald	60+	2
Heath	60+	2
Tom	60+, 1bp	3
Bakkie	60+, goal, assist	9
Rauru	60+	2
Carrick	60+	2

A defender is on top of the leaderboard:
Tim 42
Bakkie 35
Rauru 33