From the Stallion's corner

Back to the club room for the first time in ages, plenty of banter around the awards for that game. Played out something like this:

Stallion: Bakkie, classy equalising goal - best we forget the celebration and those other couple of misses.

Pony: Talking about horrible misses, Gerald, how was that header? I'll let you describe it in the match report.

Other contenders:
- Bakkie (almost a stallion/pony doubleact - a donkey- wasn't that the celebration?) The main miss was that 2 x Stallions open goal - Bakkie in the centre, Gerald at the back post, but in went through both legs.  Somehow Bakkie managed to convince us that 1 or 2 other Stallions also missed it before him.
- Chris - Appeared stripped and ready, kicked a ball against a fence and decided the leg wasn't ready. That's fine, but to say: 'I didn't want to come on and then come off and get pony again.' Chris, you clearly haven't grasped the Stallion ethos yet - never show fear for the pony, it just brings it closer.  If Bakkie's miss wasn't so utterly crap you would have had the worst ratio of pony awards to gametime ever. Now that's quite something.
- Carrick - Its not often a striker has the keeper aim a goal kick straight at you, offering a free shot and then fall over without conceding. And then do it again, and again, and again?

MVPs:
3 - Tim - A straightout powerhouse of a game, dominated at the back, and got up for another goal. Its good to play next to Tim - not just because he does everything, its damn entertaining to hear all the incentive leveled at our strikers, and Paddy.
2 - Lloyd - Another dominating Lloyd game, we all expect nothing less. Extra points this week for having Demetri spending the whole game complaining 'Oh Lloyd ..' as he was tackled, and beaten, again.
1 - Tom - Continues his great start to the season. Run them ragged down the side, and a great, almost-winner shot at the end.

Out.

Rockin Robin

With a number of current Stallions unavailable this weekend (all defenders oddly enough) the call went out to one of the Stallions on sabatical, Mr Robin Hinkley.

The text conversation went something like this:

Gaffa "Keen for a final run?  We're desperate and are scraping the bottom of the barrel" (Might not have been what quite what was said)

Bob Hinklets "Oh my god.  Am I ever.  I fly out on Sunday.  Kept my footy gear out just in case.  I'm in!  Was gonna come along and say my goodbyes anyway.  Yeah!" (Exactly what was said, have the text to prove it).

With that sort of enthusiasm we're all expecting some galavanting runs down the wing, thermal singlet, long shorts and all.  Be a great send off.

Fantasy vs Miramar

Starring Paddy ...

Dan    60+, clean sheet    7
Graham    60+, clean sheet    7
Tim    60+, clean sheet, mf goal, assist, 2 bps    17
Tangihaere    60+, clean sheet    7
Paul    60+, clean sheet    7
Jason    60+, clean sheet    7
Joe    60+, clean sheet    7
Chris       
Paddy    60+, 2 goals, 2 assists, 3bps    19
Lloyd    60+, mf clean sheet, assist    7
Aaron    60+, mf clean sheet, assist    7
Gerald    60+, mf clean sheet    4
Heath    60+, mf clean sheet, goal    9
Tom    60+, mf clean sheet, goal, 1 bp    10
Bakkie       
Rauru    60+, goal, assist    9
Carrick    60+, goal    6

Let me know if you think you have been undervalued.

Its tight at the top (mainly because Bakkie did not play in the rout):
Rauru 31
Tim 30
Bakkie 26

Stallions Meal Deal

Baby Bakkie Ribs
Sloppy Joes
Meat Paddy
Jason Aitoffee
Walker crisps
Dan Pringles

Others?

Celebrate good times come on!

There was a bit of talk between Aaron and I after the game about the fact that while we have scored 19 goals in three games, we are yet to see one decent celebration.  There's also been a bit of talk today in the football world about a certain amazing player (who does some not so amazing stuff as well) from a certain amazing club who did some biting.  We'll here's a video which combines the two.  I don't care what Bakky says, if anyone pull this s**t they're not playing for the Stallions again.  Ever.

Stallions 7 Miramar 0 a disgruntled Pony reports

After starting 2013 with a 2 and 0 record the Stallions were keen to keep our good run going as we rolled up to take on Miramar Rangers who had had a win and loss in their first two games.  Thoughts turned to 2012 when we had a similar strong start only for the season to turn into a scrap to avoid relegation.

The rain had stopped by kick-off and underfoot conditions were best described as “lush”.  Rauru named the starting line-up with the only controversial calls being the inclusion of Dan in goal despite conceding two against the Raiders (what does Graham have to do to get a start in goal?) and me up front in place of returning Uni legend Carrick “Careca” Lucas.  Ironically I had just said to Aaron 2 minutes earlier “I can’t see me getting a run up front this year as we now have proper strikers”…

The Stallions took early control of the game and we went ahead after 5-10 minutes.  Rauru got free on the right hand side of the box and after cleverly beating the last defender rolled the ball square to me and I tried my best but just failed to miss the un-missable chance. 1-0.

Shortly afterwards it was 2-0.  Some nice play featuring Gerald culminated in a corner which Tim nodded down at the far post and Heath forced home.  Miramar then had a couple of dangerous looking sorties which were well snuffed out by the Stallions’ back four.

After 20 minutes it was 3-0 as a free-kick was awarded just outside the box.  While the Miramar team milled around in typical Cap 6 confusion their ‘keeper decided to wander over to his near post leaving 80% of his goal unattended.  I took the free-kick quickly and despite its complete lack of any pace it dropped in off the far post.

 By this time a flurry of substitutions had been made as the Stallions made full use of our (unheralded) four man bench.  One such sub was Carrick who shortly after coming on (and potentially with his 1^st touch as a Stallion) received a beautiful reverse pass from Rauru and slipped it past the advancing ‘keeper to make it 4-0.

To be honest I can’t remember much more of the half apart from Paul skying an effort over the bar from inside the box, and Rauru applying a lovely finish to a pass from someone (who may have been Lloyd going from Aaron’s assists stats).

Halftime: Stallions 5 Miramar 0.

At half time Graham replaced Dan in goal and Dan took up a place on the right of midfield where his lack of fitness and athleticism was soon abundantly clear as he struggled up and down the flank.  There was much conjecture that it was this that may have contributed to a much poorer half by the Stallions and I can only concur with that.

The half, however, did start well as Tom scored our sixth after (apparently foolishly) being passed the ball by me after some lovely play in midfield.  At this stage it looked like it could be double figures, but Miramar then came strongly into the game.  They created some glorious chances which Graham dealt with admirably, however after a spell of pressure he palmed a shot directly into the path of their striker who was completely unmarked and 5 yards out.  The bench dropped their heads at the loss of our clean sheet only to look up in time to witness the miraculous sight of the striker blazing wildly over.  According to Paul he then blamed the person who had had the earlier shot for not passing it to him instead of shooting….

There was still time for the Stallions to go up the other end and make it 7-0.  Tom played a defence splitting pass to me from his role at CB and I knocked it across to Tim at the back stick who finished with aplomb.  There could have been a couple more but chances were missed and their ‘keeper made some decent saves.  Best moment was Aaron screaming “get out of my way” (I think at Rauru) as he repeatedly and desperately shot at goal in a pinball style piece of action in the last couple of minutes.

The game ended with ref Lachy refusing to give a stonewall penalty (his words) out of sympathy for Miramar and instead blowing for fulltime. 

Fulltime: Stallions 7 Miramar 0.  Stallions go top of the league on goals scored.  We have scored 19 and conceded 2, Olympic have scored 17 and are yet to concede).  And it’s the Greeks who are next up for the Stallions…..

Heard on the sidelines #42850

Graham: 'Putting me in goal is like putting Homer in charge of the nuclear power plant.'

A nice clean HOTS to get us started - now, what was that one that someone said in that Thai restaurant?

Stallions vs Raiders

While resting up on the couch contemplating this match report I realised the upside to getting pony on an injury is you don’t need to worry about the headband next game.

That said, its good to see “taking it easy on the new guy” isn’t really in the Stallion’s culture.

From the sidelines this match was entertainment+, with 6 quality goals and the turf making fast-paced passing the go-to tactic. I understand the derby took on some special meaning after we were dominated by Raiders last year, and that they said as much in their match report. You can see they are a good outfit, but were soundly beaten on a day when nearly everything fell the Stallions way.  

Up 2 – Nil thanks to well taken goals by Bakkie and Rauru meant everyone was cautiously confident at the half. However the match generally resembled a rout in the second, with a neat left-footed finish from Tom, and Rauru completing his hat-trick with two fine headers that gave the keeper no chance.

A couple of goals from the opposition (including a cracking finish from a botched corner) blotted the copybook, but the truth is Raiders were never really in it once Bakkie made it 3 – 0. They more they pressed for goals the more exposed they were at the back, and our finishing was clinical on the night.

Standouts included:

Jason and Joe, who spent most of the match monstering their strikers and pressing them into making mistakes.

Lloyd, Paddy and Tom who effectively set out their stall in midfield and bullied Raiders playmakers out of the game.

And Bakkie and Rauru for doing the business upfront and making the most of opportunities provided by the rest of the team.

2 wins from 2, and 12 goals in the For column. Not a bad start in anyone’s book. 

Chris.

(Eds note:  Chris asked me to proof read this to check the facts.  It was hard for him to remember who scored the goals and when due to the fact we scored so many.  I said the Stallions never let facts get in the way of a good story, but as we'll no doubt be showing this blog to our grandchildren in years to come to show how awesome we all were once upon a time, a few corrections.  Stallions up 2-0 through Bakkie and Tom.  Raiders pull one back before half time.  Second half me and Bakkie get goals before Raiders pull one back to make it 4-2, before I scored 2 more)

Stallions fly real high

7 - 0

Another great team win, great performances across the park, dominated from the start. As Rauru mentioned, if it was dry, hard ground that score could gave got even nastier.

I've updated the stats to the right - need some help with the assists - God, if we keep scoring like this, we are going to need a full time stats man. Assists not added yet.

Stallion:
Tim - it looked hopeless. A 3 on 1 attack, on defence Tim played all the angles, closed them down, forced a pass and then brilliantly tackled the ball carrier. Oh yeah, then he got up, distributed, and we scored. Stallion.

Pony:
Paddy, you had a great game. But that is one of the most un-stallionworthy pieces if unselfish play we have even been lucky enough to see. A 2 on 1 at the other end. Paddy, already on 2 goals (more than he scored last season), on a career-defining hat trick, a clear shot at goal, and he passes wide to Tom who dutifully slots home a beautiful shot. But Paddy, no Stallion overlooks their own hat trick. Pony.

MVP points again could have been spread far and wide, but the pub goers decided on this:
3 - Paddy
2 - Tim
1 - Tom

Check out the other crazy results - div 6 is going wild.

RAIDERS FANTASY

Sorry for the late tally ....

Another big haul for those up front:

Dan	60+, 2 goal win D,	3
Graham	60+, 2 goal win D, assist	6
Tim	60+, 2 goal win D,	3
Jason	60+, 2 goal win D, 3bps	6
Joe	60+, 2 goal win D, 2bps	5
Chris	60-	1
Paddy	60+, 2 goal win D, assist	6
Lloyd	60+, assist	5
Aaron	60+, assist	5
Gerald	60+	2
Heath	60+	2
Tom	60+, goal	6
Bakkie	60+, 2 goals, 1bp	11
Rauru	60+, 3 goals, assist	17

Leaderboard after 2 games looks a little like the Golden Boot:
Bakkie = 26
Rauru = 23
Paul = 16

Lets put this in perspective: Bakkie has already scored more that any of our full times backs did in the entire last season (Tangihaere the exception). We are off to a flyer!

Club 1st XI - Week 1 & 2

The inaugural Vic Uni Club 1st XI was posted after the first week and Bakky and Heath made the grade.  Heath's dominance through the middle earned him his spot and Bakky's hatrick gets him in there also (although somehow on the wing).

Week two sees Jason get the nod after a commanding game at CB, although the selectors felt that he'd be more useful in a wide slightly attacking role.  The selectors went for the 7-2-1 formation but obviously felt with R. Walker coming off the bench being able to score a hatrick in a 30 minute onslaught they were comfortable with scoring enough goals ;)

Raiders blog

The Raiders have a Facebook blog where they posted some, how might you say, interesting match reports last year.  After two losses this season, this is an image of their match reports.

MVP points v Raiders are in, adjudicated by our guest judges

3 - Jason
2  - Rauru
1 - Bakkie

Close, honourable mentions: Joe, Dan, Paddy

For Dan's benefit, that's us in the first game.

Saturday 20th April 2:30pm     Miramar #2     Miramar Rangers v.  Victoria University Stallions
Saturday 20th April 2:30pm     Kelburn Park   Victoria University Raiders v. Brooklyn Northern United Pilsner

Raiders Fans Console Themselves

The day after the Stallions big win. Great stuff, our best result against them ever. Capped off by some huge individual performances: Bakkie showponying that first half, the whole D dominating (with especially Jason and Joe putting in huge games), Tom on fire down the left, Dan pulling out huge saves, and then Rauru sweeping in for a 20 minute hat trick at the end. A great team effort - when thinking about mvp points we couldn't decide. So, we have passed this responsibility onto our dutiful supporters who will nominate mvp points.

As for the big awards:

Stallion: Tom, that goal was pure class. Great run, opened the body, left foot past the keeper (and rumours of some pointing going on). And of course honourable mention to Lloyd for that beautiful defence-splitting pass.

Pony: Its the stuff pony legends are made of. Chris, final sub used, runs on after about 25 minutes to right back, one pass, pulls his quad, limps off, stands in the rain for the next 60 minutes. A tough game out, but funny as all hell. Chris, at least you had a lot of time to consider your match report!

Its going to take a while to work out those fantasy points - a caculator required, so I'll get back to you with those soon. Rauru keep an eye on the Raiders FB page - would be good to test the tone of  this match report compared to their last one!

Oh yeah, any best goal/worse miss nominations? Tom's goal really, Bakkie's first was class, as for any really bad misses, Bakkie, can you explain what you were doing with that dribble? Any others?

Fire Up For the Derby

With an edited extract from that much disputed match report of theirs last season:

Another excellent win and the Raiders roll on ... Stallions are not a bad team, I know this from playing them plenty in the past. But, apart from a couple of decent players and a few good periods, they didn't trouble us much on Wakefield last night ... Karl was assured in goal. I think he had to make one save all night, the Stallions' forwards weren't up to much ... They weren't in the same league as us and it reflected our confidence ... I've never been grabbed so much at corners or battling for headers (my marker at corners insisted on linking his arm through mine), the Stallions were quite handsy and bullish off the ball. Maybe they should have been concentrating on what their feet were doing instead of touching us up...

Lucky there was no touching up of those half dressed Lower Hutt players Heath described in his match report.

Match Report: Stallions vs Lower Hutt Latecomers - 6 April 2013

Sorry for the late 'blog'.  Have been away.  I'll be honest - its quite late in the week now and I'm struggling to recall a lot of the match.  It may have been the technical concussion I suffered from Dan's corner.

I do remember the Lower Hutt team being a little disorganised.  What was scheduled as a 12:30pm game eventually kicked off at 1:15pm.  This caused what could possibly be the longest and most thorough warm-up in Stallion history.  Is that fair?   I don't know.  It was my first game for the Stallions. 

The game eventually kicked-off with LH only having 9 half-dressed players.  They struggled to defend while we struggled to attack given the multitude of attacking options.  Before long however, Gerald put in a beautiful cross and the ball fortuitously landed on Bakkie's foot and rolled into the goal.  A lucky start.

After that it was all one way.  Paul pin-balled through a couple of defenders and then smashed it into the net.  Bakkie added to his tally and Lloyd? finished off some nice build-up play.  As I said, my memory is fading although I do recall a Stallions goal being awarded by the ref, but then being overturned on appeal by the Stallions players.  I have never seen that in 20 years of footy.  

In the absence of a detailed match report, and since it was my first game for the Stallions, I'll be cheeky and provide a manager's 'appraisal' of each of you:

Dan - a wasted engine in goal (altho pretty good at it nonetheless). Needs to take some pace off his corners to avoid injuries.
Bakkie - a true striker.  Berates midfielders, wants the ball, doesnt come back past halfway.  Nice hat-trick though.
G - ran a lot up and down the left wing.  Will have the highest mileage come end of season.
Rauru - a great referee.  Keep at it.
Lloyd - A solid, classy, and unselfish midfielder.  Reminds me of another Smith.
Chris - great game if I can say so.  Needs a nickname if he is to go further.
Graham - Sets himself high standards.  I haven't seen that much personal disgust for mis-kicks before.  Ever.
Tim - has lost his edge. never shouted at anyone, not even the stallions players.  maybe thats what happens to 'passion' after two kids.
Ian that filled in - couldn't stop smiling.  Could be a sign of deeper issues.
Tangi - came out of the backline to score.  Needs to stop showing off if he wants the players' player award.
Paul - dirtiest player on the field.  Needs to attend a few anger management sessions to get himself under control this season.
that dude that came on at halftime in defence - bloody good player.

Thats all.

Heath Smith

Better get this post in this week (just in case) ...

I've talked about this on here before, but one more time won't hurt.

A great pre-season bet - Nick, full of hope in the Nix's form and exciting new signings, laid down the challenge - if the Nix won the A-league I would have to stop supporting the mighty Victory and become a season-ticket holder for the Nix (sounds like one of Morgan's stupid marketing campaigns ...). Couldn't believe that Nick accepted my return challenge - if the Victory win he returns to the Stallions. A huge call for the Vice President of a club to make (and here he is receiving a 'Good Sorts' award for all his volunteer work for the club.)

I'm from a long tradition of wrestling appreciation - where bets like retirement matches and masks vs hair matches are a source of pride and honour, and the loser (especially those who made the bet) must follow through - even more so with the Nix getting the old wooden spoon. I would have been in line to buy the season ticket the day after the final, honest.

So a couple of questions. After the Victory win the A-league, firstly:

- Do we even want Nick in this team? I mean we have come a long way since he was prancing around in the centre of defence (and do I have to bring up the 'I missed the penalty because the ball hit duck shit' moment?).

- Should the Stallions enforce this bet? As much as I would love to, even I might not be that much of a f**ker. So the question becomes - what is an alternative penalty for Nick?

We could look short term and demand some beers delivered for an upcoming game? Perhaps more long term - and say he must return to the Stallions within 3 years? or perhaps the humilation route - he must wear a pink pony headband/armband for every game this season (with photo evidence provided on the blog).

Any other ideas?

And Go the Victory!

Oh yeah, and just to show how annoying he is, from the tweet stream of Victory's last game. I guess supporting a team like the Nix you forget that teams can actually you know score goals and win games from bad positions.

Nick Goodall ‏@energy247nz 5 Apr

@heelturn how are your Melbourne bumboys going?

Expand

Nick Goodall ‏@energy247nz 5 Apr

@heelturn oh fuck. Ignore last tweet

\

Derby Day comes early this season

6:00 PM Tue 16 Apr Wellington College (Map)

Victoria University Stallions

vs

Victoria University Raiders

Newbies in among the fantasy points

The dawn of a new era brought with it a host of points for the newbies. Chris, Bakkie, Heath, Gerald and Tim all laced up their Stallions boots, pulled up their Stallions socks and put on their Stallions shirt officially for the first time, and boy did they look smart.

Those familiar with Fantasy Premier League be familiar with the scoring system and will also know that Aaron and I awesome, and everyone else pretty much gives up after 10 rounds as our lead is huge by then. This year Jason is being a pretender and hanging around like a bad smell, but just like Tottenham inevitably do, he'll crap out towards the end.

This is how the points are awarded and a few rules around them:

Action                                     Points 
For playing up to 60 minutes 1 
For playing 60 minutes or more 2 
For each goal scored by a goalkeeper or defender 6 (7 for Stallions)
For each goal scored by a midfielder 5 
For each goal scored by a forward 4 
For each goal assist 3 
For a clean sheet by a goalkeeper or defender 4 (5 for Stallions)
For a clean sheet by a midfielder 1 (2 for Stallions)
For every 3 shot saves by a goalkeeper 1 
For each penalty save 5 
For each penalty miss -2 
Bonus points for the best players in a match 1-3 
For every 2 goals conceded by a goalkeeper or defender -1 (unless we win - see below)
For each yellow card -1 
For each red card -3 
For each own goal -2 

Clean sheets 
 A clean sheet is awarded for not conceding a goal whilst on the pitch and playing at least 60 minutes. If a player has been substituted when a goal is conceded this will not effect any clean sheet bonus. 

Red Cards 
If a player receives a red card, they will continue to be penalised for goals conceded by their team. Red card deductions include any points deducted for yellow cards 

Assists 
Assists are awarded to the player from the goal scoring team, who makes the last touch before the goal is scored. If after this touch, an opposing player touches the ball outside the penalty area altering the intended destination of the ball, then no assist is given, except if this intervention directly results in an own goal. In the event of a penalty or free-kick, the player earning the penalty or free-kick gets an assist if a goal is directly scored, but not if he takes it himself, in which case no assist is given.

For the Stallions though there are a few differences.

Defenders and goalkeepers traditionally struggle when it comes to points compared to the glory boys up front so we've made some adjustments there. If we keep a clean sheet, the D and GK gets 5 points. If the team concedes one goal and we still win you get 4 points. If we concede 2 goals and still win you don't lose a point and get 1 point. Midfield gets 1 point if we concede 1 and still win, and 2 for a clean sheet. Because we change around our positions so much within a game, points are awarded to the position where you spent most of the time. If it's even the points master will have final say. Average points can be given and will be rounded down (i.e. 3 points if you play half mid and half D (5 + 2 / 2) as is the case for Dan and Chris this week). I've thought about this formula for a good few minutes so feel free to argue it with me. I think it's the fairest.

The number of saves a goalkeeper makes is a judgement call. It's fair to say that none were made on the weekend (I don't think?)

So with that in mind, here are this weeks points. I'll need some help for Bakkies assists for 1st (Paul) and 2nd (Lloyd?) goals, and Heath's goal (Dan). I got Bakkie's 2nd and Tim got Tangihaere's. No assist given for Paul's goal. It's important to note that this doesn't necessarily reflect a players importance to the team but it's a good way to have a laugh and keep things a little bit interesting.

Dan (60+, clean sheet GK/M, assist) = 9
Tim (60+, clean sheet D, assist) = 10
Tangihaere (60+, clean sheet D, D goal) = 13
Graham (60+, clean sheet D/GK) = 7
Paul (60+, clean sheet D, D goal, assist) = 16
Chris (60+, clean sheet M/D) = 5
Gerald (60+, clean sheet M, 2bp) = 6
Lloyd (60+, clean sheet M) = 4
Heath (60+, clean sheet M, M goal, 3bp) = 11
Bakkie (60+, 3 goals, 1bp) = 15
Rauru (60+, assist) = 5 (Ah shit! Do I get double since I was captain, oh hang on, I said Bakkie was, scrap that idea) (Oh, forgot to give myself the assist.  Yessss)

As mentioned, Stallion and Pony award go to people for doing something Stallion or Pony like. Missing sitters or making amazing goal line saves will earn you them. As will anything else funny or awesome. Pony can have a cracker of a game, earn 3bps and still get Pony, as Heath has proven. Sometimes the same person is up for Stallion and Pony but from memory it's never gone to the same person. It'd take something special for that to happen.

Stallion this week was Paul for his great goal at one end and great block at the other.
Pony was Heath for the tiki-taka miss. Look forward to reading the match report Heath!

Week 1, 2013..

http://www.allteams.co.nz/article/week-1-draw/109901/215928/

Capital 6 -             Lower Hutt Green Machine v Victoria University Stallions, Fraser 5, 2.30pm


This draw is subject to changes.  See www.capitalfootball.org.nz for changes and cancellations

Sorry - I hope this correct and you chaps probably know this already, but apparently Capital Soccer have changed their "systems" or something and all players (new or returning) need to register as VUWAFC players, here:


https://reg.sportingpulse.com/v5/regoform.cgi?aID=12787&formID=9579